Under Water

My eyes are glazed yet focused.  I grip him close, closer than ever before.  I don't want to let him go.  The definition of motherhood is all of the sudden pure and clear in front of me.  I am made to protect.  I am his safe harbor. Emotions flow through my body that I could never comprehend. I understand the Father.  I see His Son out of His grip.  I feel His pain as He watches from afar.  So this is love. The surgeon sweeps in and scoops my baby out of my grip.  I trust the Lord.  He is all I have and all I need.  I wait. We wait.  The longest ten minutes of my life.  I am shaken.  I am human.  I need the Lord.

Returned to me.  My sweet bundle of joy.  Hazy, confused.  He can hear.  No longer under water.  The world is fresh, alive, new.  He is safe and whole.  He looks at us confused.  How could we let this happen to him, so young and naive. He does not understand yet he trusts.

I was stretched today.  I am tired and grateful and moved beyond words expressed.  I discovered love today in a complete new capacity. Thankful for peace and protection in my home.  Forever changed.